Very often, we start taking our relationships for granted. More than that, we start taking people involved in those relationships for granted, and think that they will adjust every time as per each of our wishes. This especially happens during the young dating phase, when couples are battling career issues, financial issues, pressure of fixing a marriage date, amongst other problems of life.
What we often don’t realize is that just like we expect our partner to be understanding and accommodating all the time, they too would want us to do the same. Not realizing this, we often put forward some unrealistic demands, and hope that our partner would actually deliver the same. As a conscious and responsible boyfriend, you must understand where to draw the line. Here are some things that you should never expect from your girlfriend, as it is totally unfair to do so.
1. She’ll change her career path
No, she won’t. And why should she? You very well knew what profession she belongs to when you started developing interest in her. You knew her work timings, as well as her ambitions and desired career goals. Suddenly, why should she drop all of that for you? Just because you’ve had a sudden realization that your timings will create incompatibility issues, or that her being more successful than you will cause ego problems? You should have thought about this in the beginning, not when you are way ahead in the relationship. Never expect her to follow your trail.
2. She’ll quit her job
This is even worse than asking her to change her career path. A man who expects his girlfriend to quit her job, only after which he will consider her to be worthy of engagement or marriage is the worst man ever. Sounds harsh? Well, that’s the truth! How on earth can you think you have control over someone else’s choice of job, something that they truly enjoy, and have probably been waiting to do since years?
3. Common things can wait
So from your next month’s salary, you can either afford a good sofa for the house, or a gaming console for yourself. And you think it’ll be okay if you convince your girlfriend to let you buy the latter? That’s totally unfair. She has been working all the time to make the house a ‘home’, and convert it into a decent living space for the both of you, but all you care about is your gaming console. Instead, look at her demands and wishes first, because she has been instrumental in making your life the way it is today – much better than the way it was earlier.
4. She’ll wait
She won’t wait forever for you. And if you think she will, then you are just being plain unrealistic. You have no right to keep postponing marriage plans, just because you are not settled in your career, and your ego is not digesting the fact that she is pretty much settled and ready for marriage. When she says she has no problems with your career status right now, it means she actually doesn’t care and will marry you anyway. Then why are you unnecessarily making her wait for no reason at all?
5. She’ll change her social life for you
Once you start dating, your friends will become her friends, and her friends will become yours. Everyone gets that. But nobody understands why there is a need for you to constantly tell her to be only around your friends, instead of letting her go out with her own. You can’t constantly keep dragging her to outings with your friends, not giving her a chance to plan something with hers. Give her a chance to include her friends too in your common plans, and don’t expect her to be a silent follower every time you make social plans. She’s your girlfriend, not a tail attached to your body!
So the next time you face some problems in your relationship, or sense that your girlfriend is a little unhappy, think about all these reasons and see what could possibly be leading to the disappointment. Being in a relationship means that both the people involved are meant to be treated like equals. You can’t be unfair to her and expect her to put in more effort than you.
