Living in is a decision which both parties make and then go ahead with. If you and your girlfriend are considering to move in together, remember that it is quite a huge step for both of you and irrespective of whether you have done it before or not, you will never be experienced enough to not be bothered by the several uncertainties that come with the decision. When you have decided to stay together, probably to check out your chemistry and whether you really love each other so much as to spend the rest of your lives together, you might as well go ahead with it. But you must also be cautious about the several things that come as part and parcel with the decision. Listed below are the 7 things to think about before staying together.
1. Your willingness to live in
The first question you ought to ask yourself is that whether you are really ready for it. Why you have taken the decision to live in together is something you should contemplate for a while. Is it because she demanded it? Is it because you are crazily in love with her and cannot stay one minute without seeing her? Or is it something she pressurized you into being consenting about? If you are not ready for it, you should take a step back and think over again.
2. Your relationship’s equations
Remember that once you begin staying together, the equation of the relationship is bound to and will change. You will no longer be lovers looking forward to and then going on dates in the evenings. You will now be almost staying like roommates or husband-and-wife and this changes a lot of things which you may have earlier taken for granted.
3. The possibility of conflicts
When you begin staying together, you are bound to have conflicts. No two people can stay together without ever fighting, no matter how much they love each other. The possibility of conflict aggravates when you stay together and there is no escaping from it. Therefore, in order to still be able to live together harmoniously, you ought to make adjustments and compromises and you should think over whether you are willing to make them for the sake of the relationship.
4. Personal space
When you live together, personal space is likely to go for a toss. But it should not! Therefore, before you settle in together, talk about personal space and ensure that you give each other enough scope to be on your own as well. Just because you are staying together does not mean that you have to stick to each other throughout the day as it is likely to dampen the relationship.
5. Possessions and storage
When you move in together, you are going to bring in plenty of possessions – some belong to you, some belong to her and everything is important to each one of you. So issues relating to ‘what is yours’ and ‘what is mine’ and their storage are likely to arise. So you should think of it beforehand so as to avoid any problems later on.
6. Money matters
One of the touchiest subjects among couples who live in is money. You are staying together all right, but you are also not married. So is it all your responsibility? Or should you just split up all expenses till you actually wear the ring? In one way, the first option may appear more logical to some because eventually you are going to be husband and wife, but then what if things do not work out? Matters relating to money are more likely to cause problems than anything else and therefore you should talk about it from before and arrive at a consensus as to how you are going to manage your finances.
7. Altered sex life
Last but not the least, your sex life is no longer going to be the same. When you move in together, you are not going to be as sexually active as you used to be before. This is not something uncalled for – it is pretty normal. Now that you are staying together and seeing each other more often than before, you are not going to have the same spice and excitement in your sex life, and it is quite normal. What you must do is be ready to accept such a change and adjust to it. While staying together, intimacy would become more extensive and therefore, looking forward to an intercourse for sexual release is likely to take a backseat which is something both of you should be okay with.
