Most of the times when we are totally miserable, we ask ourselves a question. 'Am I happy in this relationship?' Why do we not ask 'Am I happy?' Is your relationship the only thing that is making you unhappy in your life? I think not. The truth is that if you have a good relation with your 'self' then you will probably have a happy relationship with your partner too.
The key to a successful relationship is being happy. So don't bother about whether or not your partner is making you happy. You must concentrate on being happy yourself without depending on anybody. To have a healthy relationship with yourself, you can do the following things.
Get rid of the guilt:
When you are in a relationship, you tend to think that every moment spent away from your partner is wasted. Having fun without him or her is a sin. As a result you feel guilty about having a delicious chocolate doughnut at office because you cannot share it with your partner. Be through with the guilt. You have every right to enjoy yourself on your own.
Spend as you like:
Most of the times we allow our partner's financial opinions to affect us. This is not right. If you are a spender and your partner is a saver, then it best to respect each others opinion. Don't force yourself to save because your partner is saving. You are not going to be happy in a relationship were you are forced to save. The reverse is also true. So keep your financial strategies separate even if your hearts are together. You shop if you want to and let your partner save. No one can go against their true nature.
Choose solitude over loneliness:
If you have ditched your friends for a weekend trip and your partner decides to go for one with his friends, then don't start a fight. You need not fear the prospect of spending a weekend alone at home. If you have a good relationship with yourself, then you should welcome solitude. Use the time to do pending tasks at home. Settle down with a book and coffee or a tub of popcorn in front of the television. You are lonely only when you think you are.
Never forget who you are:
Every relationship demands adjustment but adjustment doesn't mean changing who you are. You have to decide what you can give up for a relationship and what you can't. Suppose your partner wants you to quit smoking, then that is a justified demand. You will not die without smokes. However, if your partner demands that you become a vegetarian, then it would be changing who you are and it is not going to make you happy in the long run.
Work is Important:
If you are professionally successful then you will experience a different kind of happiness. Never ignore your work for love. The space issues in your relationship will appear trivial when you have enough work on your hands. Work hard, party harder and you will naturally be a happy person.
Never forget these golden words, 'Happy people make happy relationships'.
