Ever asked yourself that big
question, “am I falling for a friend?” or perhaps, you’re looking for a
way to go from friend to lover? Here’s your complete guide to tell your
friend and make a move from friend to lover. By Lily Margaret
Going from a friend to lover is a path riddled with confusions.
Do you think you’re falling for a friend?
Or have you looked at an attractive friend and asked yourself “am I falling for a friend?”
You’re not alone if that thought’s been running though your mind, so don’t get your undies in a twist just yet.
Friends to lovers
If you have ever taken the time to notice and grope around a bit,
you’d be able to see that there’s a distinct line separating the bonds
of friendship and love.
If you haven’t figured it out yet, look around.
Haven’t you ever noticed two friends of yours who seem to be in love, but somehow are still friends?
Or have you ever had a small crush on a friend?
Remember how weird it felt each time you hug a particular friend or held hands while crossing a street?
Well, it’s embarrassingly stupid, isn’t it?
You know the both of you should be in love, but yet, there’s that bond of friendship that seems to be holding you back.
So what do you do when you’re falling for a friend and how do you go from friend to lover in their eyes?
Do you just hold your fluttering heart in your hands until it regains
its composure or do you fling it out towards that friend and hope
they’d catch it? Let’s admit it. Would you catch a bleeding heart that’s
thrown right at you when you least expect it? Perhaps not.
So what do you do when you’re friends, but really have to be lovers?
Am I falling for a friend?!
Falling for a friend is like a little dance under the spotlight,
especially when you don’t really know how to dance. You jiggle your feet
awkwardly with your dance mate, and hope that the audience would never
figure that you have two left feet.
To your surprise, it wouldn’t take the audience long to figure your
secret out. The same goes with awkward friendships and people who want
to go from friend to lover. Haven’t we all noticed how easy it is for
people to realise that there’s something weird going on? Haven’t you
ever been teased with someone, at the very first instance when you
blushed or stared a wee bit longer at a ‘friend’?
Friend to lover or just friends?
Do you want to go from friend to lover? Of course, you want to be a
lover, don’t you? You… you naughty little bunny! Hey, I’d do the same if
I were falling for a friend too. So stop with the ‘I’m-not-such-a-perv’
class act.
Listen, wanting to go out is sweet, getting physical and cuddly is
sweeter, but there are a few things you need to know before you take the
icy plunge. First of all, ask yourself if your friend’s love is truly
what you need. Do you get jealous when your friend hooks up with someone
else, or do you want to go out with your friend each time they run back
to you crying, after another break-up?
Going from a friend to lover is a big transition, and you can ask
yourself if you’re falling for a friend a million times but it really
depends on a lot of other circumstances too. And it’s tricky business.
And most importantly, you need to remember that a lover and a friend are
two different people, even if it’s the same person.
I remember one time when I hooked up with a friend a few years ago.
He was what I had always wanted, sweet, charming, and full of wit and
humor. But once we did start going out, I saw that he was quite egoistic
and stubborn, just like me. We used to argue a lot, and eventually,
eight months after going from a friend to lover, we ended the
relationship. It was a bad way to end something that had lasted six
years. We used to like each other a lot when we were friends, but
falling for a friend asked for a lot more than just fun times in the
open. And the most important thing that both of us overlooked in love
was compromising for each other.
Going from friend to lover – The difference between being friends and falling for a friend
There isn’t too much of a difference really. When you’re a good
friend, for starters, you could ask your pal if they’re wearing that
cute silk underwear they picked up the last time they shopped. But if
you’re going out with them, you could probably take a peek too!
When you’re a best friend, you share all the deepest secrets, you’re
there for each other and you fight about nonsense. And when you go from
friend to lover, you do all of that and one thing more. You take each
other’s pants off!
So you see, quite frankly there isn’t much of a difference. However
much you’d want to deny it, the main underlying reason behind falling
for a friend or wanting to go out with a friend is because you want to
have more body contact. Yup, that’s right. You want to get physical with
a friend. There’s nothing wrong in that, so you don’t need to choke and
behave like I said something rude.
After all, it’s the emotion laden physical touch that satisfies a
lover more than anything else. But I’ve always been a strong believer in
the fact that you need to be a best friend to be a lover. A friend is
the person who spends time with you, and is there by your side at all
times, the good and the bad.
A lover, well, usually has the biggest impact in bed. If you ever
want to hook up with a friend, look at it as a business proposition!
Are you falling for a friend for the wrong reasons?
Here are five considerations that you definitely need to look into
before going from friend to lover. For all you know, it may just be a
crush, or limerence
or you may genuinely be falling for a friend. But do you really want to
mess up your friendship for that? Read these five friend to lover
transitions and ask yourself if you’re still ready fall for a friend.
Friend to lover #1 Do you have compatible
personalities? You know your friend’s behavior best when they’re in a
relationship. They may be flirty with others or they may become too
possessive. Whatever it is, do you think both of you are ready for a
serious relationship?
Friend to lover #2 Do either of you have a few
habits that totally piss off the other person? If you do, the chances of
lasting can be slim. Annoying habits are cute only for the first few
months, it can annoy the hell out of you after that!
Friend to lover #3 Are both of you willing to slide
back and compromise to each other’s wants and needs? You may have a lot
of chemistry, but without compromises, all the passion and sexual
chemistry in the world can’t make a difference.
Friend to lover #4 Can you both trust each other? I
mean completely, after knowing each other’s secrets and affairs with
other people. Frankly, both of you felt that spark and get attracted to
each other. Can you trust your friend to not fall in love with someone
else again? Or do you still think your friend might pounce on another
friend or indulge in text flirting with someone while your back is
turned?
Friend to lover #5 Are you really in love? Or do you
just have a fling in mind? Do you think moving further from friends to
lovers is a good option? Are there benefits other than just taking each
other’s clothes off?! It’s alright to want to see how a good looking
friend looks naked, but that’s definitely not the biggest reason to want
to go out with them. You may be more interested in being a fuck buddy
.
So now that you know the five pointers you need to think
about before going from friend to lover, as yourself again if you’re
really falling for a friend and if you’re still convinced it’s true love
that you want, click here about how to make a move when you’re falling in love with a friend.
