“Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take
I’ll be watching you!”
Can you imagine your girlfriend singing these lines for you in the creepiest way possible? Does she follow you everywhere even more than your shadow does? Do your friends not even remember who you are anymore because she will not let you meet anyone besides her? Does she make you do her work all the time? Does she get her way often with you using emotional blackmail? Has she unfairly accused you of cheating on her with every second female friend of yours? If the answers to the above questions are yes, then it is time for you to think you are in a controlled relationship where you get to play the puppy and she gets to play your master. Listed here are some signs that she is possessive and controlling.
1. She is curious about everything
She wants to know each detail about your life too soon. Be it the things you do when you are not with her or the people you talk to; she cannot stand one single element unknown to her. You might even find her checking your messages and your mails. This is a very clear sign that she is possessive.
2. She acts clingy
She will start by simply coming everywhere with you. You might find it sweet since it is the initial phase of your relationship. But later you realize that she is not in a mood to stop this ‘tagging along with you business’ ever. To top it all, as time flies, she becomes even more clingy towards you. She fights with you to take her everywhere with you – be it your boy’s night out or a family party where she is not invited.
3. She takes decisions on your behalf
She starts behaving like a female version of Hitler himself. She wants to be the one taking all the decisions in your life whether it is the clothes you wear or the job you take up. She constantly throws tantrums and compels you to bend down to each and every one of her demands. She takes decisions about who you should talk to and even where you should go. Soon you realize that you life is not yours anymore, you are just living it. It belongs to her now.
4. She behaves in a demanding manner
There are requests and then there are demands. There is a very fine line between the two. A request could be something like asking you to watch over her dog when she is not at home once. You wouldn’t mind it because you love her. However, a demand could be of a more serious nature. For instance, demanding that you ditch your best friend’s wedding and come shopping with her instead. When your girlfriend starts demanding such things from you, she is surely stepping on the dominating, demanding and more controlling side of the fence. Demands from controlling and possessive girlfriends can be very unreasonable and scary. For example, demanding from you that you tell her all your passwords and give her the key to your apartment. Demands can even be her asking you for expensive gifts all the time. A girl who genuinely cares about you would never make such demands.
5. She is jealous by nature
She grows green with envy for the silliest things ever. Sometimes it can be flattering to know that your girlfriend gets a little jealous about you taking to another girl. However when she crosses the limit of being “a little jealous”, it can be a problem. A jealous girlfriend is someone who will go to the extent of making a scene even if she sees you looking at another girl. She would be someone who would not even approve of your friendship with a girl. Relationships are based on trust and if she can’t trust you, then it is hard to tell how long your relationship will last.
6. She is an attention seeker
She will make up all sorts of stories to get your attention and sympathy. For instance, one night she calls you and says that she is locked out of her house. You go running to meet her like any considerate boyfriend would. But secretly she has hidden the keys herself because she wanted an excuse to be with you. Of course emergencies do happen, but if you spot such emergencies taking place more than they should be, then maybe it is time to smell something fishy.
7. She criticizes you
A good healthy relationship is made out of love, trust and support for one another. In addition to that, it requires mutual respect for one another and each other’s decisions. So, if you have a girlfriend who is constantly poking her nose into everything you do and giving her opinion even when not asked, it can get very irksome in time. No matter how hard to try to impress her, it will never work out, because Miss. Critic will always find a reason why something is not enough. This kind of behavior is a clear sign of an insecure person.
8. She is depressed all the time
It is said that you should always surround yourself with positive and happy people. A girlfriend like yours can be a punishment. Of course, everyone has sad times. But if you are dating someone who is forever sad, it will only make you too become like that in time. She is probably behaving like that in order to get your attention. You may give in to her initially, but later you will find yourself getting tired of doing it all the time.
The more control and dominance in relationship, the lesser are the chances for it to last. Possessiveness and controlling behavior of your partner will not only spoil your relationship, but it will also make you feel frustrated. Hence it is always better to spot such an unhealthy relationship and take necessary measures before it takes over your life.
