You know, well before Columbus discovered America people thought the world was flat, not round. If you asked anybody, that is what they would have told you because they had no life experience of a round world. They truly believed that they lived on a flat world. Apparently, researchers at The King’s College London used a similar technique to find out if women have a G-spot, and published their results in The Journal of Sexual Medicine. You see, they simply asked 1,800 women if they had a G-spot or not!
Does anybody yet see how this study was incredibly flawed? It showed no understanding of women, their relationship to their bodies, their sexuality and where the G-spot actually is.
Frankly, many women simply do not have any experience with their G-spot to know if it is there or not there. For a woman to find her G-spot on her own she may need a sex toy, such as a wand, to help her find it. G-spot explorers also need to be comfortable enough with their bodies to go exploring. Not every woman is up to the job. In my experience as a fertility educator, it is very difficult to get women to reach inside their vagina to feel their cervix in order to determine if they are ovulating. Many prefer to use ovulation predictor kits rather than getting to know their cervical mucus changes and how their cervix feels during various part of the menstrual cycle.
Many women don’t find their G-spot until they have a lover who is interested in going exploring with her. And for many women that means that they will never find their G-spot, or even go looking for it. Women who decide to go exploring their G-spot, either on their own or with a lover, may find that they don’t understand what all the hype is about. “Awakening the G-spot” as Charlotte Goldman-Smith, co-founder of The Pleasure Mechanics, said “can take time.”
Some women can even feel discomfort and the urge to urinate during their first G-spot explorations. Others may find that G-spot stimulation brings on emotional releases that they may not have been prepared for. At least, that was my experience. From my own experience with my body, I know that I have a G-spot. But I didn’t discover it until several years ago – and I am in my forties. I could have been one of those women in the UK study that said that I didn’t have one, because I had never been properly introduced to my own body.
I do think that the G-spot has been over-marketed the way many things are when it comes to sex. The G-spot became a selling opportunity and there is all of this G-spot pressure on women. G-spot experiences do not always erupt in mind blowing orgasms and wild female ejaculation. Getting to know your G-spot takes time, patience and often a willing partner. Every woman will have a different relationship with her G-spot, just as women are all different sexually and experience orgasm in many different ways. I hate the hype and the pressure that some women feel around all of this stuff.
Instead I prefer to encourage men and women to relax into what I call an “Organic Orgasm.” Sexual pleasure is not about achieving goals. We are not in the sexual Olympics – and no one has to measure up.
But it would be good to give women and men good information and research about their bodies. And simply asking women to self-report about a part of their body that they have never seen – or never have been introduced to – is not good science.
