Most of the triggers that cause a budding relationship to detonate are not that mysterious. Here are some of the most common:
1. Unchecked Emotional Baggage
The biggest type of baggage which will stop the best relationship in its tracks? Unresolved emotional issues. All of us carry around wounds we’ve received as children, or in past relationships; the key is how willing you are to examine them, understand them, and work through them. Left unchecked, you’ll likely encounter the same problems in every relationship you start. Self-exploration is a wonderful thing.
2. Dishonesty and Deception
Want to know how to instantly ruin a really great relationship? Then lie to your partner, cheat, or engage in other questionable behaviors. Lies destroy a crucial component in a partnership: trust. A person’s need to lie is a telling clue about his or her character, and emotional health as well.
3. Lazy Bones
“Things started out great! He planned nights out, made me dinner, and now I can’t get him off of the couch to do anything!” Some people put their best feet forward when trying to woo their partners, but once they are feeling comfortable, they stop putting any thought or energy into the relationship. This can be a fatal error. Both partners have to give in a relationship, and that means sharing responsibilities, thinking up date ideas, and providing dinner (even if it’s take-out!).
4. When Criticism Creeps In…
A once-fantastic relationship can turn negative when one of the parties starts picking apart the other. There really isn’t room for this in a flourishing relationship, when both people should be lifting one another up — not tearing each other down.
5. Different Directions
For awhile, it seems you and your new interest are in the same ‘space’ together. And then? She gets a job in another state, or he decides to go to graduate school and focus all of his attention there. Sometimes the circumstances and timing in our lives are enough to end a once-promising union. In these situations it’s not about pointing fingers, but accepting that not every relationship is meant to last. Live and learn, right?