Ever tried to pick up a woman, only to have her tell you all about the man she wants to be with? It’s a frustrating situation to be in, but don’t lose hope straight away. If you read her right, you can make her forget all about this other man.
It starts with a question
It’s difficult to open a conversation, with someone you are not well acquainted with at least, by saying you are into someone else, because this would be met with indifference. So she will probably ask you for advice as a way of mentioning it, justifying her asking you by saying she wants a male perspective. When this happens, be obliging and give her advice. Say to her what you would think if you were in his position, which will cause her to think about you in a romantic way, for a moment at least. You also need to offer her advice because you will look mean if you don’t, and she might choose to end the conversation there.
A sure way to make yourself look sleazy and desperate is to say something like “what does he have that I don’t?” or “forget about him, I’m right here!”. Just give her some generic advice, and change the topic, preferably to something that will make her laugh. Soon she will be having so much fun talking to you that she will forget her preoccupation with the guy she was talking to you about.
She could be picking you up
Ever used a line like “I need a female opinion on something” and proceed to relate an anecdote, possibly even a made-up anecdote? Perhaps that is what she is doing in telling you about the man she wants to be with. If she asks you for advice, it is quite possible that she is just looking for something to talk to you about. Find out if that’s the case by offering advice, then changing the topic. If she is happy to follow your conversational lead and doesn’t change the topic back, you have a strong signal that she only mentioned this other man (whether he exists or not) so she could have an interesting conversation with you.
It doesn’t mean you should back off
Telling you that she wants to be with someone else could be a weak hint that she doesn’t really want to get with you. Take this as a signal that you need to woo her some more, because it is by no means a definite ‘no’. If she wanted to let you know that you have no chance but didn’t have the confidence to tell you straight up, she could just as easily have told you she is with someone already so is off the market.
When she really won’t shut up about him
It’s one thing for her to mention she’s interested in someone, it’s quite another when she resists all attempts to change the topic and will only discuss her unrequited love. A woman who won’t stop talking about the man she wants to be with, despite seeming desperately single, is in a way taken. She is emotionally invested in someone else. It is likely she has glorified him in her mind to the point where no other man will compare. This is where you move on, because you’re never going to get anywhere with her. She is too obsessed with someone else to be open to other men. Your only hope is to stay in contact with her until her obsession fades, and see if she then becomes interested in you.