Work, family, chores, hobbies if we can squeeze them in, sleep, and then start all over again. In that whirlwind of activity, we are lucky to find time to exchange a simple hug and kiss with our loved one. However, you and your sweetie deserve to have romance as a staple in your life, not as a once-a-year treat on Valentine's Day. You probably don't wait until you are starving before you eat, and neither should you wait until you are starving for romance before you do something about it. So how does one work romance into one's life - especially with all the activities coming up in the summer? Try these suggestions from Liya Lev Oertel, author of 52 Romantic Evenings (Meadowbrook Press).
- Schedule regular weekly or monthly dates, write them on the calendar, and treat them as important business meetings that cannot be cancelled under almost any circumstances.
- Take turns organizing childcare and planning what you will do on those dates. And planning doesn't mean checking the paper for movie schedules. It's not too hard to plan fun, creative, and romantic dates. Once you set aside time and assign responsibility, the probability of romance in your life will increase dramatically.
- Don't assume that romance will simply happen when you have the time and energy for it. It rarely, if ever, will. Romance planning is key. For example, create romance kits by filling a box, basket, or other attractive container with all the items necessary for a romantic evening, such as music, nonperishable treats, bubbly, candles, games, bubble bath, body paints, poetry books, and so on. And when you happen to have a free hour or two on your hands, turn off the TV, take out a romance kit, and enjoy a spontaneous romantic interlude.
- Don't think that it has to be perfect or nothing at all. Most people don't have the time, staff, and budget for perfection, and so by the time you actually achieve it, if at all, you will be too tired to enjoy it anyway. Remember, a spontaneous waltz in your kitchen or backyard can mean more than an expensive dinner in the most fancy restaurant.
- Treat romance as a necessity rather than a luxury, because that's what it is.
